There's always this one person in your life you feel sorry for. Right? Like, really sorry coz you make them want to beat their head on the nearest wall.
I found mine. Not my girlfriend, she'd bang me against the wall. My bestfriend. She suffers me beyond all belief. I dunno why, I can get epic annoying most days.
Im always pinging her on chat for no reason. I leave useless blank mails in her inbox. I spam her facebook wall. I got bored one day and forced her to be my pseudo-girlfriend so that I can be all jealous when she wants to date someone else and piss her off. I randomly open her mails and then send her texts telling her about them. There is the occasional drunk dialing as well, which she never brings up ever again, she can be that sweet.
Her usual reply to anything I say is a facepalm. And then I wake her up in the middle of the night for things like these:
Me: 'ello!
Her: (sleepy as hell) Hey. What happened?
Me: You have pwetty shoulders.
Her: -_-
Why did you wake me up?
Me: Just to tell you that! You can go back to sleep now.
Her: Don't ever talk to me again. You're sacked.
And the next day she'll love me all over again. I'm always making fun of her. I even morphed her hair into a red-head-catastrophe and she didn't mind. I once accidentally cut off her a bit of her eyebrow and she didn't rat me out to her mum.
She's awesome. And for everything I do, sorry babe. You know I love you so.
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